Wednesday, March 3, 2010


So today I have been a total basket case. I've been angry at silly things and I've been not feeling like doing anything and just wanting to be lazy. Until late in the night when we were coming home from the Young Women's Fundraiser Chili Dinner which I almost didn't go to because my Husband was at work and I didn't know if I wanted to brave it with the three little ones on my own but I did anyway and it was nice. The Young Women sang some really nice songs, one in particular hit me just right. She sang about how she came to this earth to let her light shine and that she was meant to do a special purpose. And I realized that I was meant to fulfill a special purpose too and I can't just be lazy and think that I am going to fulfill my responsibilities or even be happy in living them when all I want to do is nothing.

Drive Home...

During my drive home a really good song came on the radio. And I decided that I didn't care what my husband or any other adult thought I was going to blare that song and sing it and jam. And it was a blast. (My husband hates it when I turn the music up loud oh and roll the window down too.) I just loved it. I had so much fun singing that song I just felt so happy just enjoying being myself and doing what felt good. I miss music. Since I started teaching dance and choreographing dances music hasn't been as much fun to me because it's been more about work then entertainment. I miss it.

My mini van that I was jamming out in. Which by the way is the best thing ever if you have young kids. I do love my mini van.

Lessons in Progress...

#1: Music can evoke emotion. Good or bad. I need to listen to more uplifting music and more often.

#2: Do something that I enjoy. And really enjoy it. I am the master of finding the bad in all things and I have a really hard time enjoying things and I also find it hard for me to always do the things that I enjoy. I need to make the time to do something that I love to do everyday. And I don't do that. For one I don't really love love anything. So, maybe I need to find that something. The music was a really fun thing...maybe I could do that.

#3: Don't worry about what others think about me as long as I'm not hurting anyone and I'm happy and being myself and enjoying myself what others think really doesn't matter.

No comments: